When Death Is Near
Understanding changes, finding support, and caring through the final days and hours.
When someone you love seems closer to death, you may wonder what a change means, whom to call, or how to be with them. This course explains changes you may see, helps you prepare questions for the care team, and offers ways to care when words are few. It also makes room for the waiting, the first practical steps after a death, and your own experience of grief.
Or get all five family caregiver courses for $99.
- Self-paced
- 6 modules
- 18 lessons
- 5 printable resources
- Lifetime access
This course may help if you’re thinking…
- “They’re sleeping more or eating less.”
- “I don’t know how to be with them now.”
- “The waiting is exhausting, and our family is struggling.”
- “I’m trying to manage the days afterward.”
You can begin with the question that brought you here. Each lesson offers an explanation, an everyday example, and possibilities to consider within your own circumstances. Read what helps today and return when another need arises.
Practical help you’ll find here
- Understand descriptions of changes near death and prepare questions about what they mean for your loved one.
- Gather the care team’s instructions for nights, weekends, and the first call after an expected death.
- Consider familiar comforts, shared bedside time, and support for your own feelings during the waiting and afterward.
When you need an explanation again
“I know we talked about this, but I’m frightened now.”
Understanding an explanation and feeling ready to witness a change can be different experiences. The course makes room for both, offering words for asking the team to explain again and practical pages for keeping their guidance nearby.
Six modules, at your own pace
The lessons explain the topic in plain language, then explore how it can look in everyday life. Each includes an imagined example, drawn from situations caregivers commonly describe, with room to consider what fits your own life. Open a module to see its lessons.
1Recognizing When Things Are ChangingUnderstanding changes you may notice in someone you love.
- Changes in energy and activity
- Changes in eating and drinking
- Changes in sleep and awareness
2Understanding the Final Days and HoursA gentle look at changes you may see, with guidance on whom to ask.
- Changes in breathing
- Changes in circulation and appearance
- Why timelines are uncertain
3Offering Comfort at the BedsideSmall ways you can offer comfort, guided by your loved one and their care team.
- Being present when words are few
- Comfort measures and the care team
- Creating a reassuring space
4The Emotional Experience of WaitingMaking room for your feelings, relationships, and need for rest.
- Family roles and disagreements
- Anticipatory grief and emotional fatigue
- Rest, guilt, and permission to step away
5When Death OccursFinding your next steps when someone you love dies.
- Recognizing and confirming a death
- Who to contact and what to ask
- Respecting wishes and family practices
6The First Hours and Days AfterwardSupport for the first days afterward, one step at a time.
- The first practical decisions
- Grief in its many forms
- Support and remembrance over time
Tools you can keep close
A main companion brings practical ideas together, with four supporting resources for notes, preferences, contacts, or shared plans. Use the parts that help, then print or save what you want to keep nearby. Share relevant information with the people involved in care, with your loved one’s permission.
When Death Is Near: A Gentle Companion
What to notice, what to ask, and who to call, one step at a time.
A Gentle Comfort Guide
Small observations and thoughtful questions for the care team.
Small Things That Might Help
Everyday comforts to consider according to their wishes and your capacity.
People & Numbers to Keep Close
Care-team numbers, after-hours contacts, and backup instructions to keep within reach.
When Things Change: A Gentle Plan
A few practical details to hold, so your mind can rest a little.
Here whenever you need it
- After purchase, follow the instructions to create your IEOLCA account and open your course.
- Read on your phone, tablet, or computer, a few minutes at a time.
- Use the writing spaces to gather your thoughts, prepare questions, or record something worth remembering.
- Go in the order that helps you, with lifetime access to return as things change.
A gentle note: this course offers educational support for families. Please follow your loved one’s care plan and contact their care team with questions about symptoms, medication, or changes in their condition. In an emergency, follow the agreed emergency plan or call local emergency services.
Something steady to turn to in uncertain moments
When you are wondering what a change means or what comes next, it can help to have clear explanations close by. Find guidance for questions to ask, familiar comforts to offer, and the first practical steps after a death, at a pace that fits this tender time.
Self-paced · 6 modules · Printable resources · Lifetime access
All five courses, together
You may want help with different questions as things change. The collection brings together all five topics, so you can return to comfort, conversations, the final days, or your own needs whenever they come into focus.
- Caring for Someone Who Is Dying
- When Death Is Near
- Creating Comfort at the End of Life
- Conversations That Matter
- Caring for Yourself While Caring for Another
Other courses that may help
Creating Comfort at the End of Life
Small, practical ways to help someone feel settled and known.
Conversations That Matter
Ways to begin a conversation, listen with care, and respect what stays private.
Caring for Yourself While Caring for Another
Rest, help, and boundaries for the person doing the caring.
Questions about this course
Who is this course for?
These courses are for you if you are caring for someone who is dying: a partner, relative, friend, or someone important in your life. You may be at home, visiting a hospital or care setting, or helping from a distance. You can begin with the experience and questions you have today.
Is this medical advice?
The course offers everyday guidance and questions to bring to your loved one’s care team. Their clinicians provide individualized advice about symptoms, medication, and changes in condition. The examples help you prepare for those conversations and follow the guidance you receive.
How does the course work?
After purchase, follow the instructions to create your IEOLCA student account and open the course in your web browser. Read on your phone, tablet, or computer, in the order that fits your needs. The writing spaces help you gather your thoughts, and the resources can be printed or saved as a PDF.
Can I print the worksheets?
Yes. Each course includes five fillable resources you can print or save as a PDF, so you can keep them close or share them with family and the care team.
How should I use the reflections?
Use the questions in the way that helps today: think about one, write a few words, or take an idea into your day. You can return to the course as your questions change.
How long do I have access?
You have lifetime access, so you can return to the course whenever you need it.
Can I get all five family caregiver courses together?
Yes. All five courses are available together for $99 USD, instead of $145 when bought one at a time.
Is this training to become a death doula?
This is a course for your own caregiving situation. It draws on the attentive, person-centered approach we teach end-of-life doulas, and offers everyday ways to support the person you care for. It does not provide professional doula certification.
Something else on your mind? Email office@ieolca.org.
Support for the days you’re living through
If this course speaks to what you’re facing, you can begin with the lesson or resource that feels most useful. There is room to read slowly, leave a question open, and return.